Want them blonder. :D
And I finally have enough flexion to sit in the full lotus position again, (thus being able to move fairly well for being a month out of what one of my physical therapist’s described my surgery being a full on car wreck to your knee.) I decided I was tired of having naked nails. I’ve had naked nails for a month. I wanted to paint my goddamn toenails and I was bound and determined to do so.
So I went upstairs and got my makeup bag that’s just full of nail polish/nail accessories and nothing else, limped back downstairs, (because that’s basically how I am walking. I’m not cleared for full weight yet. I am just FINALLY cleared to start putting more weight on it. And I see my doctor on the 12th so I’m hoping he fully clears me.) and sat on the couch.
I sorted through my veritable myriad of colors, finally deciding on a bright red which is called “Diamonds and Rubies”. I did all the prep work, clipping, filing, running some nail polish remover over them to make sure they were really clean and I was just happy as a clam sitting there feeling almost semi normal again, watching the Foos on a Friday night/very early Saturday morn.
Before that I had mac and cheese and a salad for dinner and watched some King of Queens.
This is the long, dragged out version of what I did tonight…I’m a fucking dork.
I think beauty is on so many more different plains than just the physical. Of course at first glance when you see someone you see the aesthetic, that’s just human nature. But as you get to know observe someone and know them, you see beyond the skin into the true heart and personality of a person. I believe that is where true beauty lies.
It’s not in what someone looks like in the face or body, not to discount it. Because physical beauty of course has it’s merit. But getting to know someone’s personality my favorite part of beauty. You get to know their compassion, their humanity. Some of the people I would find beautiful aren’t the ones that are beautiful by society’s standards.
Even though I am down on myself a lot, I can see the beauty within myself. I am a good person at heart. I may not have the world’s best self esteem or self image. In fact mine is very skewed as I was teased horribly as a child for being overweight and even once I lost the weight it was hard to accept. Sometimes I still feel like the ugly little girl.
But I know I am not ugly in my spirit, heart or soul. My spirit, heart and soul makes me feel beautiful. When I am able to help my friends and family that’s when I feel my soul glows the most beautiful. Really when I am able to help anyone in need, it makes me feel amazing.
So when I see other people putting other people down for not being conventionally gorgeous or on the other hand being too conventionally gorgeous it makes me sad and really peeves me off.
I don’t know what inspired me to write this tonight, probably just by things I’ve been seeing on tumblr lately. People being down on themselves and others.
Just keep this beautiful sentiment close to you, by a wonderful, amazing band (as do I as it is tattooed on me and the basis of my URL and nickname) “It’s not who you were, it’s who you are.”
You are beautiful and special just as you are. And always be good to yourselves.
And as has been wished upon me lately:
Lots of love and light!
reblog if you understand that the little girl pictured above is just as beautiful as the little girl pictured below <3
Yes she is and I would make sure that she knew that she was.